So last week I got obsessed with playing Sonic 3 and Knuckles again, right? Found my old Genesis in a box. Figured I’d finally master all the maps. Big mistake.
Starting Out Was a Mess
Booted up Angel Island Zone first – classic starting point. Thought I knew it well. Nope. Fell straight into those stupid bottomless pits behind the waterfalls three times trying to get up to that hidden path above the big ring. Muscle memory completely gone.
- Tried jumping onto those rotating log platforms like I used to.
- Missed the goddamn timing. Every. Single. Time.
- Wasted all my lives before Zone 2. Felt like a total noob.
Hydrocity Zone? More Like Hydro-Hell
Got past the first act okay. It’s the damn Act 2 speed tubes that messed me up. Forgot how fast Knuckles launches through those underwater sections. Rammed straight into a row of spikes I didn’t remember being there. Game over screen mocked me. Again.
Okay, took a break. Drank coffee. Came back super annoyed.
Carnival Night’s Infamous Barrel
We all know the one. The barrel in Act 2 that needs those precise hits to go up. Stuck there for over twenty minutes. My little brother walked by, laughed, and said, “They still make you look stupid.” Pissed me off enough to slam the controller… and accidentally bounce it right the way it needed to go. Pure luck. Never telling him that.
Sandopolis Is Pure Evil
Act 1 isn’t too bad, just annoying sand slides. Act 2 though? Forget it. That giant pyramid maze with the ghosts? Got completely turned around. The lights keep going out, you panic, get grabbed by a ghost, lose all your rings, and die in some stupid sand trap. Rage quit twice. My map notes for this are basically, “WHAT IS HAPPENING???” Followed by messy arrows going in circles.
- Ghosts make seeing the platforms impossible.
- Kept falling through fake floors near the top.
- Never actually completed that damn pyramid without cheats. Pathetic.
Final Stretch Made Me Want To Cry
Death Egg Zone is pure chaos. Moving platforms everywhere, laser traps, conveyor belts sending you backwards. Trying to navigate with Knuckles’ gliding felt broken. Glide right into a Badnik? Yep. Glide slightly too short and plummet? Definitely. Lost my final continue on that section with the swinging hammers and the disappearing floor tiles. Threw my arms up.
So here’s the brutal truth: Navigating all the maps without save states or level select? It’s torture. Beautifully designed torture from the 90s. I managed most of Sonic’s routes eventually. Knuckles? His routes feel like cruel jokes half the time – drop down here, break this weird wall nobody knew existed, good luck finding the Chaos Emerald path! My best tip? Bounce pads and springs usually point the correct way… usually. And save your shields for Sandopolis. You’ll need ’em.
Anyway. My “guide” is basically just scribbles saying “AVOID THIS” and “HERE BE DRAGONS” on half the maps. Feels way harder now than it did when I was ten. Maybe I’m just getting old. Gonna stick to Green Hill Zone for a while.