So last weekend damn near broke my back trying to grill for the kids’ birthday party. Thought I’d finally test if this fancy gyro grill gizmo I impulse-bought online actually saves time against my dusty old charcoal beast. Spoiler: yeah, kinda does. Here’s how it went down.
Round One: Setting Up the Damn Things
Dragged both grills outta the shed. Charcoal grill first. Had to:
- Assemble the freaking legs (found bolts missing, used duct tape like a true genius)
- Clean last summer’s gunk off the grate (took forever, smelled awful)
- Struggle with charcoal bricks – couldn’t get ’em lit for like 20 minutes. Finally used half a bottle of lighter fluid. Fireball warning, folks. Nearly torched the patio umbrella.
Total time just to get fire? 35 minutes easy. Sweating buckets already.
Gyro grill? Plugged it in the garage outlet. Wiped the metal cone thingy down. Pushed a button. It beeped. Preheating started automatically. Took maybe… 4 minutes? Felt like cheating.
Round Two: Cooking Battle
Decided burgers were the test food. Same patties, same lame salt & pepper seasoning.
Old Grill:
Tossed burgers on. Flames shot up instantly (still too much lighter fluid, I guess). Burnt the bottom before the middle was cooked. Flipped ‘em. Burnt the other side. Inside? Raw and cold near the bone. Had to constantly fiddle – lifting lid, poking, flipping, praying. Wife yelled smoke was in the house. Took maybe 15 minutes per batch just to get them kinda edible. Probably caused cancer too.
Gyro Grill Thing:
Stacked the patties vertically around the spinning hot cone thing. Weird, looked stupid. Closed the lid. Push a button. It just… spun. No babysitting. Checked after 10 minutes? Burgers weren’t burnt. Rotated slowly, cooked even all over. Outside crispy, inside juicy. Like magic or aliens or something. Whole batch done in 10 minutes flat, hands-free. Coulda been grabbing drinks instead.
The Dirty Truth: Cleaning Up
Old grill? Cold ashes dumped everywhere. Greasy grate soaked in soapy water for an hour. Scrub-scrub-scrub. Wasted water bill goes up. Got soot on my shirt. Felt like I fought a war. Total cleanup: 25 minutes of misery.
Gyro grill? Cone thing unplugged. Wiped the grease tray (paper towel, took seconds). Cone itself? Still hot, but most grease slid off. Quick wipe with a damp cloth. Done. Five minutes? Didn’t even break a sweat.
Final Verdict? Time Saved? Big Time.
Old Grill Timeline:
- Setup: 35 mins
- Cooking (one batch): 15 mins
- Cleaning: 25 mins
- Total: ~75 mins of stress
Gyro Grill Timeline:
- Setup: 4 mins
- Cooking (one batch): 10 mins (hands-off!)
- Cleaning: 5 mins
- Total: ~19 mins relaxing
Yup. Saves a stupid amount of time. Mostly because you don’t gotta fight it constantly like the charcoal monster. Plug, push buttons, food happens, wipe, done. Worth the counter space it hogs now? For lazy people who value sanity? Hell yes. Still miss the smoky charcoal taste though. Guess I’ll keep the beast for “special” painful occasions.